3 Quick Questions before Communicating in Today’s Turbulence
No matter what we say, or not, we are all communicating.
No wonder the endless variety of platforms and wavelengths we’re all communicating on gets overwhelming.
The upside is: every day is a fresh opportunity to reset your heart.
Right now, we’re all swimming in change and challenge. I’m certain God is up to something bigger than we’ll ever grasp. I don’t wonder if he’ll use our mistakes and tragedies to humble and strengthen us.
So How Do We Speak Peace into Life?
What’s on many of our minds lately is: how do I communicate well in a climate of panic, anxiety, hatred, selfishness, and greed?
I’m not sure any of us (or possibly not even all of us working together) will ever find the exact formula for eradicating the world of the ills that wreck us. We continuously face one spiritual enemy, who can percolate these ills internally, or barrage us with them externally.
So just because I believe that God’s design for humanity doesn’t involve steamrolling each other, I want to offer an idea. It’s one small suggestion from my tiny perspective.
Maybe if we asked these 3 questions of our communication—before we spoke, emailed, or commented online—we could spark reconciliation, inspiration, and love.
- Is this kind (or rude)?
- Is this compassionate (or selfish)?
- Does this build up (or tear down)?
Basically, I wonder if we took a breath or two to polish the serrated edges off our words (whether too few or too many), we might spread joy instead of fear.
We’re humans living in a hard world, so everyone we interact with is naturally wrestling with stress, anger, jealousy, terror, hurt, pride, or any number of dangerous emotions at any given moment. But in the moments prior to communicating, maybe it’s wise to guard our words from the damage these emotions can cause.
Think about the last time someone ghosted you, or at a minimum was dismissive, brash, dishonest, condescending, or critical. Nothing about that experience was generative or restorative.
Now you have a choice to make. Will you reply in kind? Will your next communication pick up the poison and continue the harm? Or will you choose to realize that person may have been going through something you don’t understand, and more meanness won’t ever fix any wound?
Choosing Kind Words Never Hurts to Try
There’s no way to completely avoid being hurt by others’ words, or even accidentally hurting others. No one will do this perfectly. But it is true that each time we speak, type, or post, we each have a chance to choose words wisely.
If we took a few moments to soften our approach, be honest about their potential impact, care about how our communication feels to others, and strive to say things that encourage—we might clear space for collaboration. Because the people you communicate with will more likely feel valued and validated.
Doing the Loving Thing Is Hard, but Valuable
It’s hard work, but I’m pretty sure you at least won’t ever feel bad about re-reading or re-thinking your words to make sure you’re treating the recipient like a full human, not a disposable commodity or an emotionless robot.
Begin with the absolute knowledge that every human needs love. And that every person has value, even if you don’t agree with or understand them yet.
Have you discovered ways to word things that fill this need?
I’d be so honored to hear from you at liamartinwriting@gmail.com, and to learn more about how kindness and respect connects and inspires.
Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Dayne Topkin